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photo of Cyrellys Geibhendach Cyrellys Geibhendach is an author, facilitator, cyber researcher, exopolitical mediator, retired professional construction consultant and operations manager. She is currently Administrator for Compass Morainn, an association of exopolitical mediators and associates. She is a contributing author of several online publications, an active blogger, and member of Open Minds Forum. She currently lives and works in Montana with her family on their ranch and participates in the local homeschool community. Cyrellys can be contacted via email.

An Abstract on Rise of Assumptions in Exopolitical Mediation
by Cyrellys Geibhendach

My Website: Compass Morainn
Journal: Compass Morainn Journal

Posted: 12:45 June 7, 2009

An Abstract on Rise of Assumptions in Exopolitical Mediation<
It is amazing how difficult we make human interactions when we use assumptions within environments in which the adherence and protection of the integrity of details is so incredibly important to the disclosers and to the long-term effects of the information beyond the original communication event. The relationship between exopolitical mediators and the participants in their mediation depends on the objective receipt, relay, & extrapolation of facts. In a tenuous inter-group social climate which ensconces the parties involved, any misunderstandings which result from assumptions can cause those communication events to literally fall apart as stress levels shred the veins of trust built through the act of mediation.

There has always been a limit of tolerance for disbelief, fact-twisting, emotional-grandstanding, and sensationalizing no matter which end or version of the participant spectrum is involved. Participant sensitivity, particularly when Insiders or Whistleblowers are involved, is rife with communication apprehension. The importance of cognitive listening is rarely understood by public observers or public participants in particular. Cognitive listening is the opposite of assuming. It is the mental process of understanding and remembering another’s message clearly and concisely.

The benefits of cognitive listening are the same as they are in other relationships. Lorna Doone of the blog “Something Good” wrote the following series of articles in which she explains that assumptions can be avoided by asking questions and verifying or clarifying the responses by asking them once again:

The Four Agreements

Part Four: Don't Make Assumptions

Part One - An Introduction
Part Two - Be Impeccable With Your Word
Part Three - Don't Take Anything Personally
Part Four - Don't Make Assumptions
Part Five - Always Do Your Best

In part four, “Don’t Make Assumptions,” she gives a very nice list of the benefits of cognitive listening without going as far as defining the term. She says, “This actually has a lot of benefits. First of all, you’re spending more time actually communicating with those you care about. They are able to see that you are willing to take time and effort to really listen to what they have to say. Secondly, you are going to be able to avoid a lot of stress and drama by not making assumptions. Finally, you can help create a great example for how you want to be treated. In fact, you can use your new-found ability to ask questions in order to let others know what you want in life.”

In exopolitical mediation, the participants are communicating for the very purpose of expressing what they want in life. Therefore the leap to assume which is a natural human tendency or habit inhibits this form of communication. This use of assumptions occurs during the maturation phase or middle phase of relationship development in which the participants learn each other’s idiosyncratic nature and develop a sense of identity through symbolic labels of the relationship. The assumptions are synonymous or indicative of the labels that are being developed. It might therefore be suggested that the participant’s inherent understanding of the information providers involved may be flawed. It may be useful to return to that foundation introduction for a revitalization of that understanding or to modify the interaction to expound and improve upon the perception of the information provider(s) among them.

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